The Players:

Sev as Officer Dale Winspear, retired Parole Officer
Emily as "Tweety" McDonnell, stripper turned bookie
Rob as James Randall, hopeless romantic and reckless gambler

The Connections:

Officer Dale is step-father to James, and was formerly Tweety's parole officer. James is in debt up to his eyeballs with Tweety, and fears retribution from her enforcer, Jamal. Meanwhile, James and Dale have a running bet as to who can bed Tweety.

The Mayhem:

As our story begins, James gets a ride from Dale to visit Tweety, hoping to pay off his debts to her with a briefcase full of Central American Bearer Bonds he received from his friend Ben. Tweety rejects the bonds, unconvinced of their worth. James awkwardly (and extremely unsuccessfully) attempts to flirt with Tweety before leaving in a hurry.

On the way home, Dale convinces James to give him the bonds under the pretense of convincing Tweety to accept them. Instead, Dale conspires with Tweety to sell the bonds to some drug dealers he knows of. Dale also flirts with Tweety, and gets a smack in the face for his trouble.

Tweety goes home, and contacts the drug dealers. They agree to a deal: the bonds for a great deal of cash.

James contacts his friend Ben for relationship advice with Tweety. After initial mix-ups, Ben suggests that a picnic is both romantic and cheap, and that buying the correct type of candle (one that won't blow out in the wind) is key to the success of said picnic. James suggests that trick birthday candles won't blow out under any circumstances, and are therefore superior to tea candles. This would later come back to bite him.

Dale and Tweety meet again, and hatch a plan to rip off the drug dealers: a layer of bonds on the top, with shredded newspaper below. They contact Tweety's enforcer Jamal O'Leary, 5'3" Irish biker, and prepare for the swap.

Thanks to the drug dealers accidentally sending their slightly... irregular friend Vito to make the exchange, the plan goes off without a hitch. Vito never suspects that the case contains anything except bonds, and he hands over the cash without a fuss. Later, however, Tweety discovers that she too was betrayed: the case contains far less money than agreed upon.

The Tilt:

Tragedy: Somebody's life is changed forever, in a bad way.
Innocence: Love rears its ugly head.
Failure: A stupid plan, executed to perfection.

James, presumably under the influence of something, calls up Tweety and asks her to come over to his place. Assuming something has gone wrong, Tweety goes. James answers the door wearing nothing but a speedo made of wrapping paper and lit candles, and begins to sing happy birthday in his best seductive voice. Unfortunately, the wrapping paper catches fire with aplomb and he suffers severe burns in a sensitive area [and after we went out of our way NOT to choose "something precious is on fire" in the tilt].

Dale receives a call from the hospital. James needs someone to pay his medical bills, and finally adds "Dale? Love hurts." Dale agrees to pay off the bills, but in exchange, James will owe him one open-ended "big favor."

Tweety, meanwhile, learns that not every drug dealer is as dim as Vito. Her contact Vinny gives her a call and incredulously asks if she thought he wouldn't notice the missing bonds. She points out that he stiffed her as well, and an impasse is averted when Vinny gives Tweety a proposal: he saw her stripping in Atlantic City, and enjoyed it very much. He'd be willing to forgive the lost bonds and pay her the difference if she would give him a private show (complete with the same feathery outfit she wore last time he saw her). Tweety is amenable to this.

To her shock, however, she finds that the costume is gone. Jamal had previously "borrowed" it for his drag show, and a horde of jealous drag queens had destroyed it completely. It transpires that the suit was made from rare albino canary feathers, and replacing it before the private show will be impossible.

After leaving Tweety to think of a stop-gap measure, Jamal visits James in the hospital, complete with bouquet of flowers and obscene get-well card. James is suitably creeped out as Jamal comes onto him quite aggressively.

After Jamal leaves, Dale finds that James' medical bills have been payed by a third party (later revealed to be Jamal). He also gets a call from Tweety asking if he can provide muscle when she does the show, as her normal enforcer has gone missing.

The show goes off with very few hitches, despite Tweety's new outfit being an artfully cut Big Bird outfit spray-painted white. Vinny passes out due to the fumes, and wakes up hours later believing he had a great time.

The Aftermath:

However, when Tweety returns home she finds that Jamal has taken all of her money and drugs, and absconded with James to Vermont. James, finding himself deep in debt to Jamal now, reluctantly marries him, and Dale loses his job due to the greatly increased drug dealer activity in the town. Tweety sells her house and moves back to Atlantic City in a more... "Professional" role than before. Dale has a flashback to the first time he met Tweety, back when they were both much younger. James dies after being unhappily married to an Irish biker drag queen for 63 years.

Possibly the shortest game of Fiasco I've ever played, and in the top three as far as over-the-top silliness goes. And that's saying a lot. Good times.

"Tweety" stole the show -- Emily carried this one almost entirely on her shoulders. Not bad for somebody who's not played the game before!

I missed an opportunity there in the last round -- Dale's story had gotten pretty stale and I'd kind of lost track of his & James's shared Need: To get laid/to prove a point. In the spirit of combining two things that were not working for me to find a synergy that works, I clearly should have had Dale sweep Jamal off his feet, thus finally proving he was more attractive/interesting than James, which would have *also* steered us away from the "predatory gay guy" theme, which I find tediously overdone.

Live and learn! (And, it's an oft-observed phenomenon that my brain shuts off around 10pm. Maybe someday this sort of alchemy will become second nature & I'll be able to play the night away. :) )